Windfalls

In 1979, two young women face the same sad circumstance when each discovers she is unexpectedly pregnant. For the sake of her life-plans, twenty-two-year-old Anna chooses an abortion, while sixteen-year-old Cerise, lonely, awkward, and without Anna’s firm sense of a future, decides to have a baby. While Anna goes on to find deep satisfaction in her career as a fine art photographer and a college professor, and—later—as a mother, Cerise discovers unanticipated pleasure in raising her daughter, even as she struggles daily to make ends meet.

When Anna’s husband loses his job and tragedy robs Cerise of a young son, the two women meet and forge an unexpected friendship that ends up affecting each of them in profound—and profoundly moving—ways.

Windfalls is a courageous and compassionate examination of the challenges of contemporary motherhood, as well as a celebration of the potential for growth and transformation that parenting, art, and human relationships can offer.

Reviews

A vivid, lightly fictionalized Motherhood 101 as two women, worlds apart, find common ground in facing the challenges of child-raising.

The two women—Anna, a noted photographer married to Eliot, a fellow academic; and Cerise, a single mother and high-school drop-out—neatly reflect current anxieties about parenting in this story that’s yet more about plight than plot. In graduate school, Anna had an abortion, and she’s still troubled—and has never told Eliot about it. Her daughter, Lucy, was an easy baby and a delight, and life was good. Then Eliot failed to get tenure and, now, they have to leave their farmhouse home and move to urban California. There, in an unfamiliar hospital, Anna gives birth to Ellen. The second birth is difficult. Ellen spends time in intensive care, and Anna, tired and depressed, later finds it hard to work at her photography. She’s also lonely, and the once easygoing Lucy is now nervous and troubled by nightmares, especially about a local little girl who has disappeared. Good day care is hard to find, too, and expensive. Cerise is even worse off; she got pregnant in high school, dropped out to raise daughter Melody, and has worked as a cleaning woman for a nursing home. She didn’t mind while Melody was young and still happy to spend her time with Mom. But now an adolescent, Melody is critical, has odd friends, is drinking and having sex. Cerise finds some consolation in an affair that produces baby Travis, but, though he’s adorable, she needs to work when her welfare payments end. Shortly after, Melody runs off with her friends, Travis dies in a fire, Cerise loses everything and must move into a shelter—in the same town where Anna now lives. The two meet when Anna is checking out day care for her daughters, and they’re briefly able to help each other move on.

Deftly rendered portraits of two “poster Moms” of today.

Kirkus Reviews


The decision whether or not to keep a child alters the lives of two young, single women in this moving if rather programmatic second novel by Hegland (Into the Forest). Telling parallel stories that ultimately converge, Hegland explores the value of work, art, family ties and the singular bond between women and their children. Anna, a graduate photography student, has an abortion, eventually marries and has two children; Cerise, a high school sophomore, keeps her baby, raises it on her own, ekes out a living and later has another child. In following the course of their very different lives, Hegland describes a full range of maternal emotions and experiences—the mind-numbing exhaustion; the weight of responsibility; the fierce desire to protect; the boundless joys and heartbreaking sorrows. When a tragic fire results in the death of Cerise’s second child and the loss of her home, Hegland illuminates the plight of homeless people and demonstrates how easy it is to lose one’s sense of self. Cerise hides behind a new identity, as “Honey,” and finds a job at a day-care center, where her resolve and sense of purpose in the face of heart-shattering grief are remarkable. Meanwhile, Anna’s life is upended when her husband’s sudden unemployment forces a move to California from her family’s Washington homestead. Circumstances force her back into the workforce, and Hegland brings fresh insight to the struggle working mothers face in juggling home life with their careers. When Honey becomes a caretaker for Anna’s two young children, a curious bond develops between Anna and Honey as the two women strive to find a sense of purpose in their lives. The result is a powerful, life-changing experience for both of them, bringing Hegland’s novel to a poignant, thought-provoking conclusion.

Publishers Weekly


To be a mother or an artist? Or both?

Anyone interested in women’s quest stories that explore these central questions will find Jean Hegland’s second novel, Windfalls, to be essential reading. Readers who know the Palouse will enjoy her vivid descriptions of Spokane and eastern Washington. Indeed the entire book seems to cast a golden-red glow on the lives of its struggling main characters, Cerise and Anna, like the “last ruddy light. . . , burnishing the fields and illuminating the roses, deepening the crimson” in a Palouse sunset.

Hegland (B.A. ’79) earns a solid place for Windfalls in the tradition of women’s quest novels headed by international literary stars such as Margaret Atwood, Doris Lessing, and Margaret Drabble. The double quest of Cerise and Anna will please readers who enjoy strong plots that focus on the characters’ confrontations with devastating life events that forever change them. The single mother, Cerise, loses both her beloved son as well as her home, a modest trailer, in a fire after her artistically gifted daughter, Melody, decides to leave home in anger. With her entire world engulfed by smoke, Cerise moves forward, refusing to surrender to the moment. The privileged and comfortable Anna learns painfully that the middle-class demands of marriage and motherhood threaten to extinguish her life as a photographer. When her husband loses tenure in Washington and takes a position in California, she finds herself unable to loosen the ties to her two daughters long enough in this new place to view it through her camera lens.

When they meet accidentally, Cerise is a homeless bag lady named Honey who has found a position in a day care center and reveals extraordinary artistic talent as well as profound psychological insights into children. Eventually Cerise enters Anna’s household as a babysitter and enables Anna to re-emerge as a photographer. But Cerise’s journey does not stop here. Anna, as the reader will discover, unknowingly helps Cerise find her daughter through her photography.

By the end of the novel, all the questions seem resolved, at least momentarily, and everyone is happily repositioned. Even Cerise’s wandering no longer seems driven by catastrophe. We are left with the confidence that she, too, has found her own “gentle light” in “the mutilated world” that Hegland has created. Disasters may seem to take away the dreams of the Cerises and Annas, but their innate human creativity, coupled with “the world’s rough grace,” empowers them to re-find their centers or to build new lives. Their stories of courage in Windfalls offer hard-won wisdom to us in this new world in which we find ourselves following Hurricane Katrina and the attacks of 9/11.

—Camille Roman, Washington State magazine


Anna, an unmarried and pregnant college student in Washington State braves a crowd of protesters to get an abortion. She’s relieved to resume her schooling and the photography she loves, but she never minimizes the loss of life. Soon she drifts into a general depression, burning her photographs and unable to shoot more. Her life seems as empty as her body.

California teenager Cerise punishes herself for her forlorn awkwardness by burning her wrists on a hot iron. Feeling grateful for the attention and yet disconnected from what’s happening, she sleeps with a boy she meets. Soon, she’s pregnant and being counseled in a LifeRight office. Cerise informs her angry mother that she will keep her baby, and the LifeRight people help her move into her own apartment and apply for welfare. Despite her sudden popularity at school due to her exotic condition, she’s soon too tired to care. She drops out of school and doesn’t care when her boyfriend finds a new girlfriend.

Ten years pass. Cerise is now cleaning a nursing home to support her beloved daughter Melody. Despite her poverty, she takes joy in her little family. Anna is equally content — married, living in her grandparents’ old house, and expecting a child.

Life takes a downward turn for both women, however. Anna finds herself pregnant with her second child just as her husband loses his job. They are forced to move to California, away from family and friends. Anna’s second daughter has health problems at birth, while her older child has trouble adapting to her new school. Anna has never regained the art that sustained her at one time; she can no longer lose herself in her photography.

Cerise struggles with Melody, who has become a hostile teenager. When Cerise consoles herself with a boyfriend, she finds herself pregnant. Travis is born, and his father vanishes. In an attempt to better herself, Cerise starts college. But an unbearable tragedy strikes soon after Melody leaves home forever. Cerise escapes to the forest, meeting a woman who tells her, “Healing is the human task. Your job is to heal.” Cerise, homeless and nearly senseless with desperation, walks miles alone in her quest for healing. Her journey eventually leads to meeting Anna, now a college teacher, and the women draw power from the intersection of their lives.

Since I read Jean Hegland’s first novel, the amazing INTO THE FOREST, I’ve been eagerly anticipating her second. WINDFALLS, in many ways a totally different work, continues her theme of how difficult yet possible survival is, no matter how far we fall.

If you’re looking for a lighthearted feel-good escape, try another book. This is a hefty, thought-provoking, densely plotted tome, filled with intense tragedy and subtle uplifting redemption. Some of the devastating events that befall these two women are almost physically painful to read. There were moments when I nearly closed the book for good because of the bleak subject matter. But by then I was in the power of a master storyteller and firmly entrenched in these women’s lives — I had to find out what happened to them. I persevered and was glad I did. The tremendous emotional payoff was more than worth it.

—Terry Miller Shannon, Bookreporter.com

Praise

“Jean Hegland is a master storyteller, capable of breaking and warming your heart in equal measure. She captures real life on these pages. WINDFALLS is a wonderful book of family and hard-won grace. I cannot recommend it highly enough: Hegland’s characters will become part of your life.”
— Roy Parvin, author of In the Snow Forest

“Jean Hegland is a compassionate novelist whose characters are at once archetypal and personal. In WINDFALLS, she has created an elegy to motherhood in all its painful, beautiful complexity.”
— Joelle Fraser, author of The Territory of Men

“Harrowing and vividly real, WINDFALLS offers a lyrical portrayal of two women’s lives, one of privilege, one of poverty. Hegland writes with precision about the many facets of motherhood—the necessary courage and the inevitable compromise. Her book is a terrific act of sympathy and understanding.”
— Lisa Michaels, author of Grand Ambition

“As in INTO THE FOREST, Jean Hegland continues to ask the questions most of us avoid, and offers answers that surprise and sustain us all.”
— Kathleen Alcala, author of Treasures in Heaven

“Here is a lovely novel by a writer who understands the consequences of the greatest blessing we can bestow upon one another, that of our physical touch; and who knows that all we really have in common in this world are the ways we can be broken.”
— Don J. Snyder, author of Of Time and Memory

“Hegland has crafted a powerfully imagined and beautifully written examination of the way a single choice can lead us inexorably to places we never thought we’d go….Hegland’s first novel was picked up by a major publisher after it caught the attention of both booksellers and readers, and her second lives up to its promise.”
— Meredith Parets, Booklist

“A powerful, extremely moving tale about motherhood, the choices we make, and the impact we can have on one another. Highly recommended.”
— Robin Nesbin, Library Journal

“Hegland’s unswerving focus on social issues—the cost of motherhood, the plight of the homeless—makes this a good prospect for reading groups.”
— Publishers Weekly

Book Group Guide

  1. Why do you think Jean Hegland chose to call her novel Windfalls? Do you think it is a good title for the book? Why or why not?
  2. The novel opens with a lyrical description of one of Anna’s photographs — of a lone tree on a barren windswept hillside beneath a stormy sky, its trunk split almost in two. What purpose do the tree and its photograph serve in the novel and in the lives of the two main characters?
  3. Both Anna and Cerise find themselves facing unplanned pregnancies, but they make very different decisions about their lives. Were the choices they made the right ones for them at the time? Do they turn out to be wise decisions as their lives unfold?
  4. Windfalls has been described as a deeply moving novel about choices that most woman face at one time or another. Discuss the ways that life circumstances either force choices on us or take them away from us.
  5. Joelle Fraser, author of The Territory of Men, describes Windfalls as “an elegy to motherhood in all its painful, beautiful complexity.” Talk about the rapturous joys and heartbreaking sorrows and terrors of motherhood depicted in Windfalls. What other novels have you read or movies have you seen that deal with the theme of motherhood and its rewards and costs? How do they compare with Windfalls? How do these depictions compare to your personal observations and/or experience?
  6. What do you think of the way the author deals with the sensitive subject of abortion and a woman’s right to choose? Are her own views about abortion made clear in the novel? Should they be? Is it possible for a work of fiction to simply explore the human dimensions of a highly controversial political, moral, or religious issue without taking a stand? If you knew that an author’s views on a social issue you feel passionately about stood in opposition to your own, how do you think it would it affect your response to her novel?
  7. In Windfalls, Jean Hegland also explores such volatile contemporary social issues as welfare and homelessness. In an interview she gave after her acclaimed first novel, Into the Forest, Hegland explained that regardless of how important an author considers the themes of her fiction to be, “in a novel, it’s the story that comes first. It’s a challenge because one can get so fervent, but more is less when it comes to fervency.” Do you agree or disagree? Do you think she succeeds or fails in Windfalls in expressing the passions of her characters while keeping her own fervency in check?
  8. Anna’s decision to terminate her pregnancy is influenced by her impression of her sister’s life. “Sally had been a painter before Jesse was born. She had studied in Italy, had won awards but the woman she’d been then seemed to have vanished into the abyss of motherhood. Anna wondered how much art was lost to the world each time another baby was born. With a ferocity that nearly frightened her, she’d thought, I could never be like that.” Later on, when Anna marries and has two children of her own, how do her views change? Do you think she succeeds in balancing the conflicting demands of art and motherhood?
  9. Why do you think Anna asked to see what was taken from her body during the abortion? Did the request surprise you? How do you think her graphic image of what she saw affected her? Why do you think she never told anyone about her abortion, and why does she finally open up to Cerise toward the end of the novel?
  10. When Cerise was a teenager she often would deliberately burn her wrists with a heated iron, a mysterious craving to hurt herself that she could neither understand nor stop, but which disappeared when Melody was born. She is frantic when she witnesses her 14-year-old daughter plunging her forearm against the heated element of the stove. Talk about the overwhelming mix of love, fear, anger, and self-recrimination Cerise—or any mother—experiences as she watches her child behave in dangerous and self-destructive ways.
  11. What do you think of the way the novel is constructed as a series of alternating sections which focus on the separate lives of its two main characters? Talk about the way the author manages to intertwine their lives. Did you discover interesting parallels or unexpected differences between them?
  12. Discuss what Anna and Cerise learn from each other and from the other characters in the book. For example, what life lessons does Anna gain from her grandmother’s story of her stillborn daughter? How does the woman Cerise encounters in the forest help her to go on living when she longs to end her life? How does young Lucy help Cerise to cope with her grief over Travis?

Questions & Answers

While your first novel, Into the Forest, is a near-mythic tale about two sisters struggling to survive alone in the redwoods in a post-apocalyptic near future, Windfalls is very much a realistic story of our time—a profound exploration of the deepest feelings of mother love that also touches upon such timely issues as abortion and the plight of the homeless in our society. Are these two books as completely different as they appear on the surface, or are there any similarities? Do they share any common themes?

One of the reasons I love writing fiction is that it allows me to explore so many different aspects of experience. Given that, it makes sense (to me, at least) that my stories would all be quite different, as there are any number of characters and situations that interest me. After I finished my most recent novel, Still Time, my agent observed that it seemed as if all my books had different fathers!

But at the same time I’m sure there are parallels between my books that suggest their common source. Some of the most striking similarities between Into the Forest and Windfalls are that both books have two female protagonists; both put a specific, human face on abstract political issues, and—perhaps most significantly—there are characters in both stories who must confront losing the very things that gave the most meaning to their lives. How we humans manage to find the strength and hope to carry on—both in extremity and every day—is a question I could not possibly exhaust in a single book.

The idea for Into the Forest came to you one sleepless night. Where did the inspiration for Windfalls come from?

The “seed crystal” for Windfalls came from a small newspaper article about a woman who had lost a child in a terrible accident. I couldn’t stop thinking about that anonymous mother, and wondering how—or whether—she found a way to remake her life after that loss. The more I thought about her, the more I realized that a story about someone like I imagined that woman to be might serve as a container for many of the questions I was currently pondering in my own life—questions about mothering, and art, and home, and the web of circumstances, choices, and chances that make up our lives.

Do you think that maternal love is the most powerful bond there is? Do you think fathers experience similar feelings for their children, or is paternal love a different kind of emotion?

Certainly for many mothers, the love we feel for our children is one of the most powerful and enduring emotions we’ll ever have. I know a great number of mothers who have been blind-sided by the fierce passion and bottomless tenderness they feel for their children, as well as by the dreadful sense of precariousness that having a child introduces into even the most secure and privileged of lives.

One factor that helps to establish the intensity of that bond is the profound physicality of most mothers’ relationships with their children; pregnancy, childbirth and nursing all serve to reinforce that connection, and those are experiences that fathers can only know vicariously. But there are also many mothers who did not give birth to or nurse their babies but who nevertheless feel a connection to their children every bit as profound as mothers who did, and fathers (and other caregivers) can experience those intense bonds, too. In my observation, those fathers who have been able to spend extended periods of time with their children—not merely as babysitters, but as real, in-the-trenches caregivers—develop particularly deep, tender, and vital relationships with their kids.

Anna, one of your two main characters in Windfalls, is a photographer who struggles to find a balance between her commitment to her art and her two daughters. Do you think it is a difficult balance to achieve? How did you manage to find the time and emotional energy to write and teach while raising and home schooling your own children?

It’s a wobbly balance, and one I never felt I managed to achieve for more than a few lucky seconds at a time. Every day I tried to be ferocious about finding time to write, and every day I also tried to be equally committed to giving up my writing time graciously when the rest of my life intervened.
I doubt I could have found the energy to try to fit mothering and writing into the same lifetime if it weren’t for the fact that both mean so much to me—and also that I found them to be so mutually enriching. As for Anna, I know that for me (and hopefully for an increasing number of other women and men), my work made me a better parent, just as my parenting added a deeper dimension to my art. Both raising children and writing books require creativity, spontaneity, patience, and discipline, instinct, intuition, and analysis, a profound faith in the process, a deep engagement in the present, a generous sense of humor, an appreciation of the sacred, and the ability to be steadfast in the face of big messes.

Although Windfalls deals with the explosive issue of abortion, you don’t seem to take sides. Do you think there is a right and a wrong side to the issue?

I personally think that every abortion is a loss, and in an ideal world, a combination of self-restraint, contraception, and supportive social services would make abortion exceedingly rare. But I also believe that much greater losses and even deeper sorrows can result when abortion is not a safe, legal and available option.

But even more important than my own stance on reproductive freedom is my deep belief that abortion is too complex and important an issue to be reduced to a polarized controversy about right and wrong. Every unexpected pregnancy is a unique story, and rather than arguing about abortion as an abstract institution, I believe we should be examining the circumstances of women’s lives, and looking at the social, financial, spiritual, and personal factors that go into women’s individual decisions to nurture or forego the potential a human embryo represents. In the recent past, it has been difficult for women who have considered abortion to tell their stories because of the stigmas—and even the threats—they have had to face. For that reason, I believe that fiction is an especially good place to begin a healthy and multi-dimensional conversation about reproductive choices.

For a long while, Windfalls reads like two separate stories. In fact, readers may wonder if Anna and Cerise will ever even meet. What made you decide to give Windfalls that structure, and to focus your novel on two such very different women?

There’s an aspect of both inevitability and serendipity to the way people meet that I find very interesting, and I like how the structure of Windfalls mirrors that. But perhaps most importantly, I like how having two characters whose backgrounds, temperaments, and choices are seemingly so different helps to suggest which aspects of Cerise’s and Anna’s experience are universal, and which are particular to their unique circumstances and personalities.

In trying to get inside the experience of your characters, you applied for assistance at the country welfare office and volunteered at a drop-in support center for homeless women. What did you learn from your hands-on approach to research?

My characters are like imaginary friends. While I’m writing their stories they travel with me everywhere, and one of the reasons I’m able to work so long and hard on a book is that I feel a commitment to my characters to get their stories right. Research is a great aid to my imagination. If I can find a way to experience what a character might actually be seeing and hearing and touching and smelling and tasting in a given scene, it’s much easier for me to know how that character would think and feel, and what she would do and say.

Also, I think it’s very important to get the facts right in fiction. The sad truth is that writer can say all kinds of wise things about life and love and human nature, but if—for example—she puts the Golden Gate Bridge on the wrong side of the bay, all her brilliant insights will instantly lose some degree of credibility with those readers who are more familiar with the Bay Area than she is. In that way, I feel I’m always writing for the people who know more about a given field than I do. It’s a challenge, but I appreciate the opportunity it gives me to learn about all sorts of important and fascinating subjects.

At one point in the story, when Cerise is suffering almost unendurable pain, she meets a woman in the forest who reminds her that “healing is the human task.” Is that the message of hope and redemption that you are sending the reader in Windfalls?

There were many ways in which Windfalls was an emotionally challenging book to work on. It contains scenes I was able to write only because I believed they were so crucial to the story and so necessary to any honest examination of the costs and gifts of motherhood. There were moments when I cried as I wrote this novel, and I’ve been honored to hear from readers who say they wept as they read it. But despite the sadness the story contains, Windfalls is a deeply hopeful and life-affirming book, and I believe that the ability to heal—or at least the willingness to try—has got to be at the heart of hope.

Often a writer sets out to write a work of fiction only to discover that the completed novel is vastly different from the work originally envisioned. How did Windfalls evolve as you worked on it?

A wonderful thing about the time and work it takes me to write a novel is that it allows me to exceed my own grasp. My initial conception of Windfalls did not have nearly the depth and complexity I’d like to think the final draft contains. The longer I lived with Anna and Cerise, the better I got to know them and to understand the issues facing them, and also to appreciate their courage and their willingness to grow as human beings and as mothers.

One of the themes that became increasingly significant during the seven years I wrote and rewrote Windfalls is how raising children affects parents’ lives. For a long time I’ve been aware that the circumstances under which a woman has children can have an enormous impact on the practical and material aspects of her life, but until I had children of my own, I never really realized how profoundly our interactions with our children can affect our own development as human beings.

Up until very recently, there have been a great number of stories about what mothers do to us, but very few stories about what mothering does to us. I think there’s been an assumption that mothering is too mundane or sentimental a subject to be worthy of a novelist’s effort or a reader’s time, and yet writing Windfalls reinforced my conviction that there are few experiences as meaningful, significant, and potentially life-changing as having and raising children.

Copyright © 2017 Jean Hegland. All Rights Reserved.